Thank you to tomato soup, grilled cheese, and the fabulously ugly coffee table I ate them on while watching Hollywood Squares.

Thank you to the snapped-tight body suits that kept me virtuous and didn’t ride up on me when sitting on the bleachers.

I am eternally grateful for the woman who pierced my ears at Caldor when I was six. These holes remain after almost 40 years of sporadically wearing hoops.

Thank you to all the new boxes of Crayola crayons and everything Shel Silverstein ever put on paper.

I am thankful for all of the Fruit Roll-Ups Mom never let me have when I was a kid because now I get to enjoy each sweet, leathery bite with little to no shame.

Thank you to the Voltron lions that were easy to replicate out of cardboard and hang on the Christmas tree.

Thank you to Flick from A Christmas Story who inspired my brother to test the tongue-on-the-frozen-pole theory. We’ll never let him live it down.

I could not be more thankful to the New Kids On The Block for giving my shitty childhood something to look forward to at the end of each day. I saw a lot of me in the shy, fish-out-of-water, hard to forget but impossible to remember kid. I still do.

I’m thankful for the first day I learned how to tell a story and grateful for the last day I thought I couldn’t.

Thank you to every Micro Machine or Lego I ever stepped on.

Thank you to the rollerskating rink which taught me that life can be a series of repetitive circles, where I’ll fall down a lot, but at least I can roll to great music and have at least one hand to hold.

I’m grateful this pen can keep these memories alive, and I need to thank everyone who decides to join me in this journey – may all who enter enjoy these Pudding Pops of nostalgia.

Lastly, I am blessed for the family and friends who’ve watched me hit rock bottom more times than they should have but never failed to keep me looking up.

And when I look at the sky from the 10th circle of hell, sometimes I see angels – whether they’re the feathery winged angels, the actual Care Bears, or bunches of Michael Landons. They are there to help me reach the stars.